They do not have to love you, what’s most important is that you love yourself
-Christiana Stephen (c), 2016
Revenge, dislike, bitterness, disgust, envy, spite, coldness etc are all synonyms of hatred. So when next you find yourself during all these or any of these things just know you are hating and it keeps your heart unhealthy. Your heart is a powerful tool in staying healthy. Once your heart is healthy then you are on your way to emotional wellness. The new year is 2 days away so we have to try to drop old habits and move on.
Hatred is an extremely strong feeling of dislike towards something or someone. Numerous questions has posed by Elie Wiesel ‘Why hate? Why yield to its sombre and implacable force for which, locked on itself, manifests its will to destroy for reasons that bring embarrassment and despair to the human condition? What good may derive from hatred? Is there, can there be nobility in its realm?’.Navarro (2013) defines it as a strong, negative feeling against the object of the hatred. The hater sees the object of their hatred as bad, immoral, dangerous, or all of this together (Staub, 2003).
I choose to write about this because a lot of times we are in self denial of what exactly we are doing. We try to keep our feelings subtle and play things down when in the true sense we are indirectly killing ourselves.
When you find yourself getting angry to the point of not being able to forgive, rather than think of what the person did to you think of what you are inflicting yourself of and ask this question-Is this really worth my health and life?
People can be so annoying and the worse if this are they ones we truly love like our spouse, kids, colleagues, family etc. I will take one of this and explain in details.
Some of they things our spouse can do to really piss us off or keep us bitter include cheating, abusing us verbally and non-verbally, being insensitive, neglecting their duties and a lot more. Yeah all these are so painful because we expect too much from them. We expect our spouses not to cheat on us, not to abuse us and all what not. The truth is that we deserve to be treated better. I have been there and I understand but I will share tips on how to overcome such bitterness for the sake of our health and to improve our emotional wellness.
Do not enter 2017 without making a conscious effort to stay healthy and live above hate. Remember if not for anyone do it for your self.
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I am Dr. Christiana Stephen, a wife, a mom of 4 under 4 year old kids, a photo lover, makeup artist, a wellness coach and a lecturer. Motherhood for me is ongoing, its a period of learning and unlearning. I am passionate about a lot of things but most importantly helping mothers around the work reach their wellness goals comes as top priority. Hence, I have created this community for every woman out there. Feel free to be part of this amazing journey of motherhood and wellness. I will say raising this community is inspired by my experience and learning process. The main essence is to empower moms on the benefits of healthy living as well as the need to create a life work balance.
I am nice so a lot of people say and I believe I am very approachable even when there is a lot to be done. I love teaching. I can teach on a lot of things including time and stress management.